Ah, Egg Day, delighted to make your acquaintance. I must say that I love everything you stand for. You're a food enjoyed by all, from toddler to geriatric, king to convict, and you always remind me of the sun, even when you're not served sunny side up.
After a rather challenging week, with Native Americans, homosexuality, teddy bears and facing fears, daysoftheyear.com is giving me a real Friday treat. I bloomin' love eggs: fried, poached or scrambled; with pepper, ketchup or brown sauce; as part of a greasy fry-up or in a protein-rich sarnie; boiled with soldiers or transmogrified into an omelette; and regardless of time of day, location or hunger levels, I can't get enough of the little tinkers!
Without even realising I began the festivities at 1am, when I returned home from an unscheduled night out and prepared, then demolished, a fried egg sandwich on wholemeal bread. No wonder I dreamed about chickens all night.
Arriving at work, I was elated to find that a colleague had made me a gift. His name's Eggbert and I've been told he's meant to look like Hitler. I guess he has to resemble someone, right?
As part of lunch I planned on buying some Creme Eggs and eating them in a variety of ways, demonstrating the effectiveness of their marketing campaign, but the newsagent didn't stock them so I ended up with a transparent bag of what looked like Cadbury's Mini Eggs. They turned out to be Peanut M&Ms, but they were mostly egg-shaped.
I was tempted to get caviar from Tesco but decided that fish eggs were one step too far. Plus I had no idea which aisle they were down and would feel pretentious asking a member of staff, only to be told to try Waitrose.
I was tempted to get caviar from Tesco but decided that fish eggs were one step too far. Plus I had no idea which aisle they were down and would feel pretentious asking a member of staff, only to be told to try Waitrose.
I'm going out for the night now but I've managed to read Egg Story before leaving. Never heard of it? I urge you to buy a copy! It's only three quid and even if you're not a fan of graphic novels there's an 87% chance you'll love it. Trust me, I know my egg-themed graphic novels better than any man living.
Right, I'm off. Make sure to get some eggs down yer gullet!
Check out #eggday on Twitter and see how others around the world are marking the occasion. Messily I hope, that's the best way!
He that would have eggs must endure the cackling of hens.
Proverb